Chinese Women Give Their Reasons on Why They Prefer Foreigners

Recently I’ve been intrigued on why many Chinese women are looking for a foreign spouse. I thought then why not just ask them directly? So off I went.


First girl, is a a recent high school graduate who is hoping to study overseas. She hopes to find a foreign boyfriend, but he has to be White. She really likes Starbucks and English accents.

Translation of interview:

I don’t want a Chinese man.

Well, foreigners are just so honest you know, they say things as it is. For them the truth is the truth.

This is unlike Chinese people who are all so fake.

Seriously, foreigners are not fake at all. They just say what’s on their mind. I think it’s great. They definitely aren’t like Chinese guys, who all have an objective. Foreigners are different. If they like you, then they like you. If they don’t like you, then they don’t like you. They wouldn’t try to lie to you. This is why I want to find a foreigner, I’ve had this idea for a few months.

They all asked me, “Why find a foreigner? China has so many men. It’s because I’ve been hurt too much already. Lied to so many times. It’s really left an impression on me. I don’t want to be in contact with Chinese (men) anymore, they feel so fake to me.

She has also been on TanTan (Chinese Tinder) swiping for foreign matches. Sadly, she has recently been met with unfavourable results.

tantanwhiteguy

She showed me this photo of a TanTan encounter with a foreigner. She said she did not mind them being ‘liberal’ but sometime it was a bit too much.


 

Second person is white collar worker who hopes to find a gentleman type foreigner for marriage. She is fluent in English and teaches it part time.

Translation of interview:

I think part of it has to do with appearance, girls like (men) who are big and tall…with more diverse hair colours…and foreigners have tall noses making them very handsome….and they all really care about exercising and caring for their bodies.

Intellectually, foreigners are just more global and know more. Generally Chinese girls will like those who are more knowledgeable. Foreigners are also very polite, they have good manners.

For me, one certain foreigner left a very deep impression on me. One time I was at his place washing my hands. He told me to not use too much soap as it’ll pollute the environment. He told me that the Chinese sewage system did not have a way to treat such waste so I should take more notice. At the time, I was very surprised, he was very selfless in his thinking, as he cared about the country and other matters that were on the news. I found the way he would follow current affairs very admirable.

Also, you usually want to find someone with a different attitude from that of yourself. Chinese people find foreigners have a vastly different way of thinking. You can never guess what they’ll think of next. In my opinion, this will spice up a couple’s life.

Foreigners have strong logical and critical analytical skills. I’m not saying Chinese people don’t have such skills, but they are just not as good at critical analysis as foreigners. Comparatively, this will make Chinese girls think foreigners are intelligent. As they will use logic to look at an issue, in order to solve it or analyse it. They also are very balanced in outlook, rarely sensationalising.


The third girl works within the arts, she says she actually prefers speaking English over Chinese. She enjoys Hollywood movies, keeping in shape and really has a burning passion for the less fortunate. Unfortunately, she refused a voice interview.

I asked her: “Why not local guys?”

whynotchineseguys1.jpg

Her reasons relating to why she didn’t like Chinese men, were mostly to do with hygiene and manners.

whynotchineseguys2.jpg


All the interviewees were from within the big Chinese cities such as Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou and Shenzhen. Of course being just personal interviews with a small sample size focused on a single topic, you should not take this as gospel, but more as some food for thought on the Mainland Chinese dating scene.

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About Cheng

I have a BA in Politics, as if that matters...but otherwise I'm just sitting here looking at some maps. Yes, I love maps and especially historical maps. Otherwise, I am just another human being.

10 thoughts on “Chinese Women Give Their Reasons on Why They Prefer Foreigners

    1. Cheng Post author

      I do not want to disclose too much information on the interviewees but they were all thin and had many pursuers.

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    2. GGHapa

      From my observations, most of them are not that attractive to the local guys so they tend to lean towards foreigners because they get attention. I’m mixed-race, but “pass” as white so it’s a strange situation when I hear them be dismissive towards local guys, but it’s always fun to see their shock when I tell them my dad is Chinese.

      I would also add that from what I’ve observed, despite them saying they prefer foreigners, a lot will still date local Chinese. I’ve met several that married foreigners and yet still cheat on them with a Chinese boyfriend… so it’s a strange situation.

      I feel like they just want to be contrarian. And definitely they are the minority. Especially once you leave the expat bubble, the vast majority (95% I would say) only want to date Chinese men.

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  1. Harvey

    What is their opinions of american born chinese? Ones that understand the chinese culture but are exactly the way she describes a foreigner? I have dated a Chinese girl seriously from China (came here from college) and the opposite was true. I was told how idiotic I was for being so direct and honest. I had the complete opposite experience haha.

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    1. Cheng Post author

      It depends, one of them did say that certain ABCs are bananas and are acting all fake, they should stick to being Chinese.

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  2. Leewah

    Cheng,

    What do you personally think of the comments that these women made? They obvious have some biases, creating generalizations that absolutely favor “foreigners” (and I am assuming they mean to say White, Black, and Latino people and it skips over nonChinese Asian people like Japanese, Korean, Thai, Filipino…) while throwing Chinese people under the bus. I chuckled a bit how one of the respondents said a high nose bridge=handsome and that foreigners care about bodies and exercise. The western world is TERRIBLE with obesity.

    Do you think there is some social background you’d like to share? Why do these women strive for “greener pastures?” Do these women ACTUALLY like how foreigners look, or is it more about how looking white, black, or latino (mostly white) is more about status?

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    1. Cheng Post author

      I was personally very offended, but I chose not to disclose my opinions towards the respondents, as I did not want to influence their answers.

      They were only talking about foreigners in the White sense actually. It was not specified in the verbal interviews, but for them being a foreigner is having pale skin.

      I will not say too much but they are all well educated and comparatively more wealthy than most Chinese people, so it was a surprise. What was a similarity between all of it, was that they consumed large amounts of Western media such as television, cinema and only listened to Western music.

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      1. Leewah

        Cheng,

        Thanks for the reply. That last part about Western media consumption actually explains A LOT. Thank you for doing this survey, at least we can get some hints even with a very small sample size.

        Cheng I have one more question. Let’s not talk about the respondents anymore. In China (or in East Asia in general), does the word “foreigner” really just mean white people or anyone that is not East or even Southeast Asian? I would like to know about the etymology. Basically, for example, Japanese and Koreans are not deemed “foreigners,” but something else?

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        1. Cheng Post author

          Well it depends on the term used but as ‘laowai’ is generally translated as ‘foreigner’, then in this case, it’s mainly aimed at White people. Generally Japanese, Koreans and westernised Asians will be called just ‘waiguoren’, which also means foreigner. During the interview though, the term ‘laowai’ was used.

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